Vol. I · No. 1 Saturday Edition NZ$49

The Best Man

Speech Writer
The speech they'll be quoting for years

The speech is already in you.
We just get it out.

Tell us about your mate — the stories, the disasters, the details only you know. We write three full speeches — different tones, same stories. You pick the one that fits.

Answer a few questions. Three speeches ready in 60 seconds. NZ$49, one-time.

Here's the kind of thing you'll get.

Every speech is built from what you tell us — your stories, your mate, your words.

Opener № I
“Before I begin — the rugby club has asked me to remind you that the standing ovation at the end of this speech must be kept to under two minutes. They've got the under-14s playing at four.”
Tane's best man
Opener № II
“I've been asked to read a short message from the crew at the workshop. It says: ‘Aroha — we've shared a smoko table with him for fourteen years. We tried to warn you. We sent emails.’”
Macca's best man
Opener № III
Queenstown. Stag do. Half eleven at night.
Riley at the bar.
Orders a pint in te reo.
Gets brought a tray of whitebait fritters.
Eats every one. Pays. Says nothing.
Riley's best man
Built for New Zealand

Written for Kiwi blokes. Not a generic AI.

We know what a smoko break is. We know rugby club receptions are still a thing. We know what a proper send-off sounds like — and we write speeches that fit.

NZ
Built here

Built specifically for Kiwi weddings. Not adapted from somewhere else.

3
Styles

Wry, banter, or full bogan. Three speeches, you pick the one that fits the room.

0
Generic filler

No “journey”. No “heart of gold”. No words you'd never say out loud.

Most speech writers don't know what a smoko break is.

“Sounds like someone who actually knows us.”
How it works
I

Tell us about him

Answer a few questions — how you met, his finest moments, the stories you'll never let him forget.

II

We write three speeches

Different tones, same material. You pick the one that fits, and it's yours to deliver.

III

Walk up knowing you've got something good

Copy it, tweak it if you like. Then deliver the speech he deserves.

Tell us about your mate.

We'll write the rest.

The Offer

Three full speeches. Personalised. Instantly.

Answer a few questions, pay once, and get three complete speeches — written around your stories, ready to deliver. If none of them work for you, email us and we’ll sort it.

Not happy with your speeches? Email us and we’ll fix it or refund it.

Three speeches, you choose Not templated — built from your stories No subscription Email support if anything goes wrong